Doctor Who - SERIES 8 Review [PART ONE]

Or: "Moffat Needs To Go [Part One]"

If you've watched the 8th series of (New) Doctor Who, you'll have noticed 3 things.

1. Peter Capaldi is an excellent Doctor who has matured over the series. He has the right mix of hero and alien with some darker elements too.
2. Clara has really come into her own. Whether you like her or not, a few episodes have been strong for her.
3. The writing has gotten progressively worse. (Namely with the stories Steven Moffat has had a heavy involvement in).

Now seeing as, for the Brits, the series ended about an hour ago, I'd like to review Part One series (Episodes 1-7) in my own opinion*. So let's start right back in August.


8.1: DEEP BREATH (by Steven Moffat) - In which a dinosaur spits out the Tardis in Victorian London, we learn Strax can throw as well as Abu Hamza playing cricket and the Clockwork Droids return but the Doctor refuses to recognise David Tennant's existence.

The first episode of a new Doctor. What can we expect? Humour? Regeneration energy? Confused associates? HOW ABOUT A BIG ASS DINOSAUR IN VICTORIAN LONDON (WHICH THE DOCTOR ATTEMPTS TO FLIRT WITH), AN OBSESSION WITH OXYGEN RETENTION AND ATTACK EYEBROWS!? Sound good to you? Yes Peter Capaldi's first adventure as the Time Lord was a rushed story which started with the, somewhat, usual story of the regeneration affecting the Doctor weirdly which then progressed with the Doctor running off after his beloved dinosaur spontaneously combusted before finally returning in a homeless guy's outfit in a restaurant run by Moffat's creepy creations, the Clockwork Droids. After a long dialogue and realisation scene, the Doctor runs away, leaving Clara to play detective before magically rescuing her and possibly committing murder. It's a roller coaster of an episode if you can look past the shocking writing, the thinly veiled attempts at humour by exploiting Strax's Sontaran impulses and the fact Capaldi is actually kind of absent in this episode, it's not bad. The best thing about it for me was the inter-species-lesbian-kiss-come-life support. But THAT got the most complaints. Hmm. JOSHUA'S RATING: 5/10


8.2: INTO THE DALEK (by Phil Ford and Steven Moffat) - In which the plot to Innerspace is somewhat plagarised but instead of being injected into an unsuspecting man in a lift, they're injected into a faulty Dalek. Who seems to recover by the flick of a switch and we meet Danny Pink, another character you have a limited time to fall in love with before something bad happens to him.

OH MY GOD. THEY'RE GOING INSIDE A DALEK. WE'RE GOING TO SEE DEEPER INTO A DALEK. OH MY GOD THIS IS SO EXCITING. Oh wait. This is like 'Journey To The Centre Of The Tardis' and a let down. So much promise. The Doctor, Clara and a few other people get miniaturized and put inside a Dalek to repair it after it claims that the Daleks are evil and need to die. (Seriously, why would you try to fix that? Use it as an ally ffs). Anyway, we find out that the Dalek has an immune system that can kill. (Because obviously Davros foresaw the exploration of Daleks in the distant future). So, to test it, the Doctor tricks someone into dying before eventually working out how to get around it. After the team unwittingly turn the Dalek's evil mode back on, the Doctor attempts to have a mental struggle with it so that it would re-convert back to its good self. Although this may all sound good on paper, it was actually very poorly written, very rushed, and a bit of a disappointment. JOSHUA'S RATING: 2/10


8.3: ROBOT OF SHERWOOD (by Mark Gatiss) - In which the Doctor gets proven wrong about the existence of Robin Hood, Gold seems to be the main plot device and there's a distinct lack of Jonas Armstrong**.

In my opinion, the first decent episode of the series. Clara decides she wants to meet Robin Hood, but the Doctor rebuffs the idea and decides to be proven wrong. However, it appears Clara's right and he does exist although the Doctor disputes that he's actually a robot until the last 10 minutes of the episode. Although the premise seems a little unimpressive, the writing, directing and filming is absolutely brilliant as well as the acting. Tom Riley, who plays Hood, does an excellent portrayal of the legendary hero of Sherwood Forest and Ben Miller, who plays the Sheriff of Nottingham, also performs an excellent role, although a little under-used I think. Capaldi plays the Doctor as a very prickly character in this episode but it works well with the dialogue between him and Riley, especially in the dungeon scene. However, it is hard to look past the fact that, despite Robin pining for Marion, he's happy to chase Clara who practically goes fan-girl for the story. Also, if you go to the Doctor Who Experience in Cardiff and see one of the robots up close, it really makes you appreciate the upward camera shot. Very humorous, very creative and definitely one of the more entertaining episodes of the series. JOSHUA'S RATING: 7/10


8.4: LISTEN (by Steven Moffat) - In which this stereotypical Moffat story has everything you'd expect. Questions, more questions, and a real mind-bender of the concept of time and reality by all accounts.

As you may have noticed by now, I'm not a huge fan of Moffat's writing for Doctor Who. 'The Day Of The Doctor' was, by all accounts, phenomenal, (though I do have qualms) but I find most of his writing as show-runner stupid, terrible and reckless. However, when I saw the trailer for this episode, I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt as it looked quite good. This is why I have trust issues. The start of it, and the basic idea of the antagonist, was good. Something under your bed, a primal human fear (which I seemingly missed out on. I was more concerned about the Muppets running around my room at night...long story). And this was, at first, interestingly tackled. You had the scene with young Danny Pink in a childrens home who was scared of something under his bed. When Clara investigates, something appears in the bed looking very creepy indeed. Now, this was great! If it wasn't for the fact that we kept having scenes with Clara on failed dates with Danny Pink or that we suddenly got ORSON Pink who was a time-travel pioneer despite the fact that we'd already met one in 'Hide' a year previously. So now we get an implied notion that Orson is a relative of Danny Pink and, perhaps, Clara! (Remember that, this becomes important when I cover the finale...) The end of the episode shows that, for one person, Clara is under the bed. But as for everyone else in existence, WHO FREAKING KNOWS. WE NEVER GET TOLD. Sleep tight, kids. JOSHUA'S RATING: 5/10


8.5: TIME HEIST (by Stephen Thompson and Steven Moffat) - In which the Doctor, Clara and two others attempt to rob the most secure bank in the universe under someone else's instruction. However, because it's Stephen Thompson and Steven Moffat writing it, it's guaranteed to screw you over once again.

The first half of the series should have a tagline: "With the exception of Episode 3, this half of the series sounds good, but actually we could've spent more time making it so much better on screen!" From the man who brought you JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF THE TARDIS comes another mind bender that doesn't quite make sense and, is really, just a disappointing filler episode. It consists of the Doctor, Clara, a human Apple Mac and one of Charles Xavier's students on day release, all attempting to break into the Bank of Karabraxos, THE MOST IMPREGNABLE BANK IN EXISTENCE. Except they manage to do it because it's not much of an episode if they failed and, if Orange Is The New Black is anything to go by, Clara wouldn't survive long in prison. However, they go up against THE TELLER. A stereotypical Doctor Who alien who can unlock the greatest secrets of a person by reading their minds. Which unfortunately has the side effect of turning you into a human egg-cup once he's finished. The team must race against time in order to enter the Private Vault before the Teller catches them and, ultimately, kills them. But when they do, THE EPISODE UNRAVELS AND IT'S A KIND OF ENDLESS LOOP THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE BUT IT JUST PROVES WHAT A WASTED OPPORTUNITY THE ENTIRE EPISODE CAME TO BE. Ahem. Decorum regained. JOSHUA'S RATING: 4/10


8.6: THE CARETAKER (by Gareth Roberts and Steven Moffat) - In which we go back to where it all began, Coal Hill School. With little to no reference to the first two human companions on Doctor Who, the Doctor's granddaughter or the fact that the Doctor is somehow CRB checked. (And, trust me, that cannot fit into psychic paper).

For all the stick I give Moffat, this episode was actually pretty good. It was in Coal Hill School, where the first Doctor Who companions from 1963 (Susan Foreman, Barbara Wright and Ian Chesterton) all found themselves day after day. However, Clara is a teacher there. As is her boyfriend Danny Pink. But when the Doctor (somehow) gets the job of Caretaker, shit gets real. The Skovox Blitzer is in town and it's out for blood. But do we know where it's from or why? Not really no. All we know it's one of the worst machines ever created in the history of ever. But do we get a focus on it? No. Instead, we concentrate more on Clara's love life. The episode is humorous and has some good bits but it's mainly more about how Clara is lying to Danny (which becomes commonplace as the series goes on) and how he deals with the fact she's dating him while running around creation with a grey haired Scottish man. I'd call that mixed signals. However, it all wraps up quite nicely in a little bow and it's an entertaining romp. However, I can't help but think that the fact it's held in Coal Hill is to pacify the classic fans more than the nu-Who fans... JOSHUA'S RATING: 6/10


8.7: KILL THE MOON (by Peter Harness) - In which the Doctor, Clara and Hermione Norris arrive on the moon in an attempt to work out why it's cracking. And it turns out to be something that most Game of Thrones fans will scoff at vigorously.

So. Simple. Go to moon, meet mutant spiders, avoid mutant spiders at all costs and blow up the moon. The only thing from this list they do complete without incident is 'Go to moon'. This episode features humanity at it's best/worst/most natural after a team of astronauts arrive in a shuttle with a hundred nuclear bombs on board ready to blow up the moon. Because a massive tsunami is threatening humanity's existence. What could possibly go wrong? It's Doctor Who, so, everything. The team attempt to work out what they're dealing with in the weirdest ways possible without being killed and consumed by the big-ass mutant spiders which aren't actually spiders. (Yup). However, at the end, we find possibly Doctor Who's most weirdest twist yet. THE MOON IS AN EGG CONTAINING SOME KIND OF DRAGON WHICH CAN ASEXUALLY REPRODUCE AT 10 SECONDS OF AGE. Only on Doctor Who could this make total sense and no-one bat an eye-lid. However, we also see the Earth condone the killing of an alien child buried in the moon on the risk it MIGHT cause them flood damage and make them lose their no claims bonuses. JOSHUA'S RATING: 6/10


TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR SOME MORE CYNICAL REVIEWING AT THE HANDS ON YOURS TRULY WHERE I'LL (ATTEMPT***) TO EXPLAIN THE MUMMY, AN EPISODE SET IN BRISTOL NOT FILMED IN BRISTOL AND WHY I PERSONALLY HATE MOFFAT MORE AFTER TONIGHT'S SEASON FINALE.

Good night :)






*These opinions DO match the views of Writers Block and its affiliates. Namely me.

**I realise only certain people will get this reference. If you do, fab! If not, isn't Google fantastic!

***If I can I deserve a f*****g medal.