Doctor Who - SERIES 8 Review [PART ONE]

Or: "Moffat Needs To Go [Part One]"

If you've watched the 8th series of (New) Doctor Who, you'll have noticed 3 things.

1. Peter Capaldi is an excellent Doctor who has matured over the series. He has the right mix of hero and alien with some darker elements too.
2. Clara has really come into her own. Whether you like her or not, a few episodes have been strong for her.
3. The writing has gotten progressively worse. (Namely with the stories Steven Moffat has had a heavy involvement in).

Now seeing as, for the Brits, the series ended about an hour ago, I'd like to review Part One series (Episodes 1-7) in my own opinion*. So let's start right back in August.


8.1: DEEP BREATH (by Steven Moffat) - In which a dinosaur spits out the Tardis in Victorian London, we learn Strax can throw as well as Abu Hamza playing cricket and the Clockwork Droids return but the Doctor refuses to recognise David Tennant's existence.

The first episode of a new Doctor. What can we expect? Humour? Regeneration energy? Confused associates? HOW ABOUT A BIG ASS DINOSAUR IN VICTORIAN LONDON (WHICH THE DOCTOR ATTEMPTS TO FLIRT WITH), AN OBSESSION WITH OXYGEN RETENTION AND ATTACK EYEBROWS!? Sound good to you? Yes Peter Capaldi's first adventure as the Time Lord was a rushed story which started with the, somewhat, usual story of the regeneration affecting the Doctor weirdly which then progressed with the Doctor running off after his beloved dinosaur spontaneously combusted before finally returning in a homeless guy's outfit in a restaurant run by Moffat's creepy creations, the Clockwork Droids. After a long dialogue and realisation scene, the Doctor runs away, leaving Clara to play detective before magically rescuing her and possibly committing murder. It's a roller coaster of an episode if you can look past the shocking writing, the thinly veiled attempts at humour by exploiting Strax's Sontaran impulses and the fact Capaldi is actually kind of absent in this episode, it's not bad. The best thing about it for me was the inter-species-lesbian-kiss-come-life support. But THAT got the most complaints. Hmm. JOSHUA'S RATING: 5/10


8.2: INTO THE DALEK (by Phil Ford and Steven Moffat) - In which the plot to Innerspace is somewhat plagarised but instead of being injected into an unsuspecting man in a lift, they're injected into a faulty Dalek. Who seems to recover by the flick of a switch and we meet Danny Pink, another character you have a limited time to fall in love with before something bad happens to him.

OH MY GOD. THEY'RE GOING INSIDE A DALEK. WE'RE GOING TO SEE DEEPER INTO A DALEK. OH MY GOD THIS IS SO EXCITING. Oh wait. This is like 'Journey To The Centre Of The Tardis' and a let down. So much promise. The Doctor, Clara and a few other people get miniaturized and put inside a Dalek to repair it after it claims that the Daleks are evil and need to die. (Seriously, why would you try to fix that? Use it as an ally ffs). Anyway, we find out that the Dalek has an immune system that can kill. (Because obviously Davros foresaw the exploration of Daleks in the distant future). So, to test it, the Doctor tricks someone into dying before eventually working out how to get around it. After the team unwittingly turn the Dalek's evil mode back on, the Doctor attempts to have a mental struggle with it so that it would re-convert back to its good self. Although this may all sound good on paper, it was actually very poorly written, very rushed, and a bit of a disappointment. JOSHUA'S RATING: 2/10


8.3: ROBOT OF SHERWOOD (by Mark Gatiss) - In which the Doctor gets proven wrong about the existence of Robin Hood, Gold seems to be the main plot device and there's a distinct lack of Jonas Armstrong**.

In my opinion, the first decent episode of the series. Clara decides she wants to meet Robin Hood, but the Doctor rebuffs the idea and decides to be proven wrong. However, it appears Clara's right and he does exist although the Doctor disputes that he's actually a robot until the last 10 minutes of the episode. Although the premise seems a little unimpressive, the writing, directing and filming is absolutely brilliant as well as the acting. Tom Riley, who plays Hood, does an excellent portrayal of the legendary hero of Sherwood Forest and Ben Miller, who plays the Sheriff of Nottingham, also performs an excellent role, although a little under-used I think. Capaldi plays the Doctor as a very prickly character in this episode but it works well with the dialogue between him and Riley, especially in the dungeon scene. However, it is hard to look past the fact that, despite Robin pining for Marion, he's happy to chase Clara who practically goes fan-girl for the story. Also, if you go to the Doctor Who Experience in Cardiff and see one of the robots up close, it really makes you appreciate the upward camera shot. Very humorous, very creative and definitely one of the more entertaining episodes of the series. JOSHUA'S RATING: 7/10


8.4: LISTEN (by Steven Moffat) - In which this stereotypical Moffat story has everything you'd expect. Questions, more questions, and a real mind-bender of the concept of time and reality by all accounts.

As you may have noticed by now, I'm not a huge fan of Moffat's writing for Doctor Who. 'The Day Of The Doctor' was, by all accounts, phenomenal, (though I do have qualms) but I find most of his writing as show-runner stupid, terrible and reckless. However, when I saw the trailer for this episode, I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt as it looked quite good. This is why I have trust issues. The start of it, and the basic idea of the antagonist, was good. Something under your bed, a primal human fear (which I seemingly missed out on. I was more concerned about the Muppets running around my room at night...long story). And this was, at first, interestingly tackled. You had the scene with young Danny Pink in a childrens home who was scared of something under his bed. When Clara investigates, something appears in the bed looking very creepy indeed. Now, this was great! If it wasn't for the fact that we kept having scenes with Clara on failed dates with Danny Pink or that we suddenly got ORSON Pink who was a time-travel pioneer despite the fact that we'd already met one in 'Hide' a year previously. So now we get an implied notion that Orson is a relative of Danny Pink and, perhaps, Clara! (Remember that, this becomes important when I cover the finale...) The end of the episode shows that, for one person, Clara is under the bed. But as for everyone else in existence, WHO FREAKING KNOWS. WE NEVER GET TOLD. Sleep tight, kids. JOSHUA'S RATING: 5/10


8.5: TIME HEIST (by Stephen Thompson and Steven Moffat) - In which the Doctor, Clara and two others attempt to rob the most secure bank in the universe under someone else's instruction. However, because it's Stephen Thompson and Steven Moffat writing it, it's guaranteed to screw you over once again.

The first half of the series should have a tagline: "With the exception of Episode 3, this half of the series sounds good, but actually we could've spent more time making it so much better on screen!" From the man who brought you JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF THE TARDIS comes another mind bender that doesn't quite make sense and, is really, just a disappointing filler episode. It consists of the Doctor, Clara, a human Apple Mac and one of Charles Xavier's students on day release, all attempting to break into the Bank of Karabraxos, THE MOST IMPREGNABLE BANK IN EXISTENCE. Except they manage to do it because it's not much of an episode if they failed and, if Orange Is The New Black is anything to go by, Clara wouldn't survive long in prison. However, they go up against THE TELLER. A stereotypical Doctor Who alien who can unlock the greatest secrets of a person by reading their minds. Which unfortunately has the side effect of turning you into a human egg-cup once he's finished. The team must race against time in order to enter the Private Vault before the Teller catches them and, ultimately, kills them. But when they do, THE EPISODE UNRAVELS AND IT'S A KIND OF ENDLESS LOOP THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE BUT IT JUST PROVES WHAT A WASTED OPPORTUNITY THE ENTIRE EPISODE CAME TO BE. Ahem. Decorum regained. JOSHUA'S RATING: 4/10


8.6: THE CARETAKER (by Gareth Roberts and Steven Moffat) - In which we go back to where it all began, Coal Hill School. With little to no reference to the first two human companions on Doctor Who, the Doctor's granddaughter or the fact that the Doctor is somehow CRB checked. (And, trust me, that cannot fit into psychic paper).

For all the stick I give Moffat, this episode was actually pretty good. It was in Coal Hill School, where the first Doctor Who companions from 1963 (Susan Foreman, Barbara Wright and Ian Chesterton) all found themselves day after day. However, Clara is a teacher there. As is her boyfriend Danny Pink. But when the Doctor (somehow) gets the job of Caretaker, shit gets real. The Skovox Blitzer is in town and it's out for blood. But do we know where it's from or why? Not really no. All we know it's one of the worst machines ever created in the history of ever. But do we get a focus on it? No. Instead, we concentrate more on Clara's love life. The episode is humorous and has some good bits but it's mainly more about how Clara is lying to Danny (which becomes commonplace as the series goes on) and how he deals with the fact she's dating him while running around creation with a grey haired Scottish man. I'd call that mixed signals. However, it all wraps up quite nicely in a little bow and it's an entertaining romp. However, I can't help but think that the fact it's held in Coal Hill is to pacify the classic fans more than the nu-Who fans... JOSHUA'S RATING: 6/10


8.7: KILL THE MOON (by Peter Harness) - In which the Doctor, Clara and Hermione Norris arrive on the moon in an attempt to work out why it's cracking. And it turns out to be something that most Game of Thrones fans will scoff at vigorously.

So. Simple. Go to moon, meet mutant spiders, avoid mutant spiders at all costs and blow up the moon. The only thing from this list they do complete without incident is 'Go to moon'. This episode features humanity at it's best/worst/most natural after a team of astronauts arrive in a shuttle with a hundred nuclear bombs on board ready to blow up the moon. Because a massive tsunami is threatening humanity's existence. What could possibly go wrong? It's Doctor Who, so, everything. The team attempt to work out what they're dealing with in the weirdest ways possible without being killed and consumed by the big-ass mutant spiders which aren't actually spiders. (Yup). However, at the end, we find possibly Doctor Who's most weirdest twist yet. THE MOON IS AN EGG CONTAINING SOME KIND OF DRAGON WHICH CAN ASEXUALLY REPRODUCE AT 10 SECONDS OF AGE. Only on Doctor Who could this make total sense and no-one bat an eye-lid. However, we also see the Earth condone the killing of an alien child buried in the moon on the risk it MIGHT cause them flood damage and make them lose their no claims bonuses. JOSHUA'S RATING: 6/10


TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR SOME MORE CYNICAL REVIEWING AT THE HANDS ON YOURS TRULY WHERE I'LL (ATTEMPT***) TO EXPLAIN THE MUMMY, AN EPISODE SET IN BRISTOL NOT FILMED IN BRISTOL AND WHY I PERSONALLY HATE MOFFAT MORE AFTER TONIGHT'S SEASON FINALE.

Good night :)






*These opinions DO match the views of Writers Block and its affiliates. Namely me.

**I realise only certain people will get this reference. If you do, fab! If not, isn't Google fantastic!

***If I can I deserve a f*****g medal.

Nothing Happens In My Hometown

Let me have this rant.

Ok. So. I've been a Whovian since I was 10. I might be 20 now but I'm still just as much a kid now as I was then.

So imagine my surprise, shock and jealousy when I had numerous people message me telling me that Peter Capaldi, PETER FREAKING CAPALDI, was casually walking round my hometown today!

But was I in my hometown at the time?

THE HELL I WAS.

I was at university an hour and a half away.

Here's what annoys me most.

It's not that Capaldi was in my hometown. It's not that it was announced. He's a human being, of course he can do things to himself, I'm not suggesting that in the slightest.

It's that practically nothing happens in my hometown when I'm there. But it's all fun and freaking frolics when I'm gone.

When I'm there, jack shit happens. The worst that will happen is a cow escapes. But when I go, the BBC visit when they plant some (frankly stupid) snowdrops, the guy who appeared in the Hovis advert in the 70's returns to turn on the Christmas lights and, now, DOCTOR FREAKING WHO VISITS MY HOMETOWN.

Do you know what pisses me off more?

I'M GOING HOME FOR A HOLIDAY NEXT WEEK.

Grr.

It just seems all the good shit happens when I leave.

I've also just seen a picture of a friend's daughter who had her picture with her and that hasn't helped. I'm extremely happy for her, don't get me wrong, but I can't help but be EXTREMELY JEALOUS BEYOND WORDS.

I can only imagine some people's reactions to seeing Capaldi walking down the High Street just casually looking around. And I know exactly how I would've reacted.

(It would've involved some initial confusion, close inspection and then me making sounds I never thought I could make, before asking if I could have a picture taken with him).

I can't help but be rather saddened by this news.

I can't complain because I've met two previous Doctors (Colin Baker and Sylvester McCoy) but still, meeting Capaldi would still have been amazing and I would've died a very happy man.

Oh well.

If you happen to read this and you did in fact meet him and converse with him in town, please keep it to yourself. Just know I'm very happy for you, I'm jealous and I wish you and I could've swapped places at that very moment.

Especially when I've been working all afternoon.

Shit happens. Or, in this case, doesn't.

Be just our luck Tennant visits in a fortnight.

Why I'm A Communist, And Why I'm Not

Let's paint the town RED

When I started my current University course last year, I was fairly certain that I was a Labour supporter or somewhere in the centre of the political spectrum. I accepted that some things had to be done in order to raise money to get us out of the recession but I also had my own ideas of what I felt was fair.

However, since starting the course, I've realised a few things. A friend of mine on my course, an open Thatcherite, used to call me a Communist. This was because, compared to her, I am one. But I realised that at that exact moment I was only one of 3 people in my class who were open enough to admit they have left-wing tendencies. In the class we had 3 open lefties, many who were dead centre, some who were Thatcherites (yes, there were 2!), many undecided and 1 Conservative Christian. We had a great mix of people and, for the most part, we all got on.

But the real world isn't the same as this. Since the 1950s; if you appear to be too left wing or self-identify with views that are stronger than Labour's, you're called a Communist. Some people are proud of the fact that they're a Communist and some would rather keep it to themselves. For a while, I thought I was a Communist. But then I realised a few things.

1. I agree with what a lot of Marxism has to say, but much of what we call 'Communism' isn't Marxism in its purest form. Our first major taste of "Communism" was actually Leninism and then, later, Stalinism. Leninism and Communism are not necessarily the same thing nor are they completely worlds apart. But many leaders who have implemented Communism (Lenin, Stalin, Mao, Castro, Il-Sung, etc) have added their own addendum's to the original Marxist text.

While a lot of Karl Marx's initial ideas are very good and practical, many of the mutated forms of Communism haven't worked. The Soviet Union went into economic decline in the 1980s and eventually dissolved in the 1990s. North Korea is one of the worst states imaginable to the point where calling North Korea a 'Communist' country is actually beyond a joke. But some Communist states do work. For example, Cuba is doing well for itself and China is set to overtake the American economy as the world's strongest by 2030 if current trends continue. Despite these, "Communism" as we know it is not pure Marxism. They're actually quite different.

2. I don't like Capitalism, yet I'm a slave to it. I know some Communists would tell me "this is exactly the problem" but some aspects of Capitalism do work. However, much like Communism, it can be easily corrupted. In the Capitalist world, workers are exploited on a daily basis. (If you don't believe me, take a look at your Nike shoes if you're working them. How much do you reckon those men, women and children are paid so that you can feel comfortable).

Factories burn down in Bangladesh and the companies do very little in terms of compensation and some companies (mentioning no names SHELL), will drill on the territory of African tribes who have been there since time immemoriam and get the country's military to displace them if they decide to act in protest. Capitalism, just like Communism, is so open to corruption in the higher echelons of its institutions that it's practically common practice globally. (And if you really want to see Capitalism at its best, look up the term 'Lobbyist' and have a read of what their job is. America have some amazing examples that...)

3. If you honestly think that there is no such thing as Elitism in the UK in particular, you are seriously deluded. If you cannot see that the class divide between Upper and Lower classes is still as prevalent, if not more prevalent, than the Victorian era then you're very naive and I pity and somewhat envy you. Not realising that the British system is fraught with favoritism to the upper classes sounds wonderful as you're blissfully ignorant to the terrible reality. Allow me to elaborate. My lecturer last year (I'm not mentioning names this time) always used to tell us that, if you're a member of the upper classes, an economic downturn/recession is a fantastic time to go shopping. Because, for them, the prices either remain the same or, in some cases, get better.

If the value price of a house plummets for some reason, it's wonderful if you're a member of the upper classes because you can just buy it up while it's at a reduced price should you choose to. While the rest of us are struggling to make ends meet, the upper classes are loving it. If you can't see this or choose not to believe it, I wish I had your ignorance sometimes. (Also, as another example, a man named Alessio Rastani said in 2011: "I go to bed every night and I dream of another recession". My point wrapped up in a nice little bow, from the horse's mouth).

Now, everything I've said there would be deemed as "lefty propaganda" or "commie talk". (Especially if you're a UKIP, BNP or EDL supporter). However, everything I have put in there is true. Up to and including the Shell thing. But does this make me a Communist? No. Not really.

It makes me someone who cares about the world enough in order to want to go out there and try to make it a little better.

Now, I make no secret of the fact I'm not religious. I'm a Humanist and I'm open of that. I don't hate religion, I think it's good in some respects but I find myself disagreeing with many things some religious people say or teach young children. (For example, an evangelical in America saying recently that you can catch AIDS off a towel in Kenya because "they have AIDS in Kenya". Yeah. And I can catch Ebola from a Djembe drum because "they have Ebola in Africa!)

The same works with politics. I don't hate politics in the slightest. In fact, I love it. I wouldn't be taking a degree in it if I didn't love it. But what I do hate is how things that happen in the UK has now become commonplace and to be expected. And I don't like the stigmatization that some groups get just because Government have talked about them briefly. (Hence my deep hatred for UKIP on some things. And the less I say about Nigel Freaking Farage the better we'll all be).

In fact, the Secretary of State for Work and Pensions in the UK, Iain Duncan Smith, said today that people who have Multiple Sclerosis and Parkinsons will be deemed fit for work. To be satirical and cynical, he's lied so much in his life and on his CV I wouldn't be surprised if he was a Doctor at some stage.

But I don't hate politics, I just hate what it's becoming. I see in the UK people like UKIP and some Conservatives wanting the UK to leave the European Union after the next election. This saddens me. I hate how people presume that benefit fraud is one of the worst problems in this country yet, while the evidence suggests otherwise, the Government are doing nothing to ease the stigma or to change public perception of the poor and disabled. I'm not naive enough to say benefit fraud doesn't happen but I know it's not as bad as people think it is.

So does this make me a Communist? Wanting a fairer society with a reformed version of the Capitalist system we have where the class divide is as minimal as humanly possible? Does wanting real change in terms of a living wage, environmental policy and treatment of the lower and lower middle classes make me a Commie? Does wanting to stay in Europe and wanting Britain to play a significant role in it's overdue reformation make me a Red? And does wanting more input into political and religious education in primary and secondary schools make me a revolutionary?

I personally don't think so. I'm a Green Party supporter and they stand for most of what I stand for as well. (Admittedly, I have a slightly different approach to nuclear power than many other supporters but hey). But despite this, I still believe in a fairer society for all. And though that may sound idealist (or Liberal if you're a politics student/political scientist) I'm enough of a Realist to know that it's unlikely to happen in my lifetime. But as John F Kennedy said in his inaugural address:

"All this will not be finished in the first one hundred days. Nor will it be finished in the first one thousand days, nor in the life of this Administration, nor even perhaps in our lifetime on this planet. But let us begin".

I heard this for the first time the other day and I cheered internally.

So am I a Communist? I don't like the current Government, I want them out and I disagree with many Labour Party Policies of late.

Or am I not? I just want a fairer society for my future children and their children to live in and if I can have a hand in creating that world then tell me where to start.

You decide.

They say "Better dead than Red". I'd definitely dispute that...