Over the summer, I became aware of this phone app known as 'Tinder'. I was already aware of 'Grindr' and thought that this was a good idea. However, I wasn't aware there was another similar app. While my friends suggested I go on Grindr, I didn't feel I'd be much use on Grindr. So I decided, more for an experiment rather than anything else, I would try Tinder. Where, at the very least, I might have a chance at meeting someone.
For those who don't know, Tinder is an app whereby you put in 'discovery preferences' along with a mile range and they show you anyone within your parameters who are close by. People use this app either to make friends, find love or to find a partner for a one night stand. Or friends with benefits. I don't judge. If you like someone, you 'swipe right' and, if you're not interested, you 'swipe left'. There's a new feature called 'super-like' but I haven't tried that yet.
While I didn't get on in order to meet anyone, it was obviously in the back of my mind. But I already had other plans of what to do. If I ever got a match, I'd send a very bad joke just to see how they react. If they reacted well and wanted to carry on talking, fine. If they used colourful language to tell me to go away, also fine. Each to their own.
So I got it and made my profile look decent. Using both embarrassing photos as well as slightly better looking ones to throw a curveball.
After a month, this is what I've discovered.
- Tinder is surprisingly addictive. I've always been fascinated by the number of people in the world and this has kind of shown me how many people there are in a certain area. Even if a lot of them are after...illicit things. It's still nice to see such a diverse range of people though in such a comparatively short area. Very fascinating.
- I have a type. Most people I swipe right to tend to be awkward looking, ginger or look slightly geeky/nerdy. Sometimes, all 3 at once. After years of not thinking I had a type, I've evidently been proven wrong. I seem to be drawn to more geeky girls who are extremely socially awkward and have a more red tinge to their hair. I've known for some time I'm a sucker for accents so perhaps my type is a socially inept redhead from Ireland with a comic and Doctor Who obsession. Who knows. But there seems to be a pattern developing.
- There are a lot of people with very strange names. The variety of names on this app are phenomenal. They can range from foreign names to just downright bizarre ones. Obviously you get a lot of Claires, Victorias, Alices and things but when you find someone called 'Rocket' and 'Jessica-Falcon' that you start to wonder if they actually exist. With the amount of strange names on this I'm starting to wonder whether Bob Geldof has had thousands of illegitimate children! Not that it detracts from the person in hand but it is very odd to see some of the titles that come across your screens.
- People are very blunt on their profiles. People on Tinder don't seem to beat around the bush. While they are perhaps frugal with personal details, some put quite a lot on there. Not only that, some people are very blunt about what they're looking for. If they're looking for friendship, they'll say. If they're after something serious, they'll say. If they want to do a certain sexual position, chances are they'll say it. I genuinely saw one profile which had in its description "just looking for a wheelbarrow partner ;)". It's amazing what people put on this. People put this stuff and I'm there calling myself a professional jelly baby.
- A lot of people feel the need to cake themselves in make-up. I don't judge people unless they give me a reason to. Nor do I have a problem with these people. But I've always wondered why young ladies feel the need to literally cake themselves in make up in order to feel pretty. I know it's been the culture for perhaps 15 years to do so but, still, it is a little confusing. I imagine it has a lot to do with the fashion of the time as well as shows like TOWIE and Jersey Shore influencing societal perception of beauty. But, still, there's a lot of these people in Tinder. In fact, I'd hazard a guess that these ladies make up 70% of all Tinder female profiles. It's not a criticism or anything, I'm just saying. It's very interesting to see.
- People do lie about their age but you can usually tell. There are people on Tinder who do indeed lie about their age. For the purposes of this month, I kept my parameters between 19-23 (my own age range) but there have been people who I've looked at and seen straight away that they're not 21 as they claim. What is interesting though, if you go on their profiles, many will admit their real age which, to me, seems somewhat counter-productive. I've come to the conclusion that most of them are about to turn the age they've put in their profile but are stipulating they are still a little younger for a time. But there have been some who have claimed to be 21 and are blatantly 16. Which worries me slightly but, hey, this is the 21st century?
- A lot of people on Tinder a much better travelled than me. The majority of people on Tinder either have photographs that contain endless selfies of them on nights out or with friends, or they are packed with photos from all across the world. Some hug elephants, some tombstone off a cliff and some hug African children. While I feel happy for them they've had these experiences, I can't help but feel jealous. And swipe left as a result.
- I've had 3 matches and they don't like my sense of humour. Admittedly, one of them was a friend at my uni and we did it to make each other feel better. But still, I've sent all 3 young ladies I've matched with a bad joke to see how they react. The first one, (a young lady by the name of Charlotte), I sent "How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it!". No response. The second one, (a young lady called Zoe), I sent "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!" Though she already knew the punchline. And made it clear she wasn't impressed at all. The third match, (my friend Kira), I sent "Do you have the Titanic soundtrack on your iPod? I will do, it's syncing now". Again, not impressed but she's used to my humour. I've come to 3 possible conclusions. 1, These ladies (with the exception of Kira) don't have a sense of humour. 2. They just wanted to flirt continually and I didn't submit to that. 3. (and the most likely), I'm just not that funny. Who knows.
- The men are pretty handsome. I'm open to the concept that one day I might meet a guy and fall in love with him, therefore I do not submit to a single sexuality. So, for a couple of days, I included men in my search just to see. While I wasn't attracted to any of them during that period, I can comment that they are aesthetically good specimens. If you're a woman or gay and on Tinder, I reckon you'll have fun trawling through the guy section. Just as much as guys and lesbians would have fun going through the female section. The best thing about Tinder is that it is very inclusive. There are no exceptions to Tinder. If you have a type, you'll probably find them on here.
- Finally, there will be people you knew from school and some of your friends on there. This both shocked me and didn't shock me at the same time. When I used it back home, I found a lot of people I knew from 2 local schools as well as good friends of mine. Some of whom I was genuinely surprised at. Today, I was using it and I found a friend from my uni on it, Someone who I genuinely didn't expect to find on there. Which was a nice surprise. But you will find people you know on there. So, if you're friends with them, swipe right. They'll probably swipe right for you too and it'll be an ice-breaker the next time you meet up. Plus it's another way to send stupid messages to your mates!
So, there you have it. My main findings about Tinder. I usually complain about the 21st Century but, for once, I've actually found a passing craze that's kinda fun. And a bit of harmless fun didn't hurt anyone. Right?
Until next time.
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